How to fall from grace

by Ralkkai

How to fall from grace
the best way you can.

Make a ham and
roast beef sandwich
on a sesame seed bun with swiss
mayo and yellow mustard
and eat it on a deck
in Colorado
the wind beats the shit out of
the wind chimes
the plastic chairs
the pine trees
the mountains
the humanity.

Remind yourself
of the coffee from this morning
that didn’t taste quite like
a Costa Rican bean
slightly too roasted
to the point where it was
all burn and no oil.

Remind yourself
of the most beautiful person
in the world
as she sleeps on the couch
watching Netflix and wearing your t-shirt.
Don’t let her stir.

Remind yourself of when
you didn’t understand God
and that this time around
even if you don’t understand Him again
you can at least have the
common decency to be a gentleman about it.

It isn’t that you are a bigger man
once you fall from grace;
it’s more like you are different.
Your shadow is a little bit skewed
and your strides are shorter.
You breathe differently
when you are lost
then when you ar found.

Move on,
move away from these thoughts
that you are the last man on Earth.
You are not.
Your thoughts are your own
but they are not original.
You may be a prototype,
but your blueprints were drawn up
by someone else.

Calling something
a flying spaghetti monster
doesn’t make you unique.
In fact it makes you a sheep
just the same.

I have been on both sides of the fence
and too be honest,
even if I fall from grace
the best way I know how
I will probably prefer to
lay wth the shepard’s flock
rather then the atheist’s broken home
filled with broken records.

Sometimes falling from grace
the best way you can
takes courage
enough to stand on mountains
made from the corpses of the fallen.